Leading From Your Title vs Leading From Your Heart
I am a pastor. I have been a pastor for the past 10 years at the same church, faithfully serving in whatever area needed me. Being a pastor consumes my entire life, in that I am never really off the clock. It is what I have wanted to do since I gave my heart to Jesus. I love it. The funny thing is, when I meet new people I make a special point to leave out the fact that I am a pastor. Unless specifically asked what I do, I don’t even mention my line of work. I have no problem sharing Jesus’ love or even the fact that I go to church but to me, being a Pastor, although an honor, is a huge stumbling block for most people.
I was in a discussion recently with an older pastor who had been in the ministry for many, many years. In the conversation about meeting new visitors at church, he found it odd that I never introduce myself as a pastor at the church. He couldn’t understand. I explained to him that when I extend my hand to a new visitor, or even someone in public and introduce myself as “Hi, I’m Pastor Marshall” an immediate wall goes up.
For some people meeting a pastor is frightening, they feel like all we do is judge people for their decisions. Like we want a lengthy explanation on why they haven’t been to church. Or we are just looking for an opportunity to fix their life choices.
For other people, meeting a pastor is a horrible experience. Maybe they have been hurt by a pastor, or they knew of one who molested a kid. Their entire view of clergy is based on disappointment and heartache.
There are also people who think meeting a pastor is the best thing that can happen to them. They want to take advantage of the relationship, use the church to advertise their personal business or ministry. Meeting a pastor is just the ticket they need to make themselves feel validated.
There was a time when the office of a pastor was widely respected. It still is by some people, but for most it’s a punchline to a joke. People have been let down, abused, or heard about scandals so much that when I share my title it only hinders me from building a true relationship, and that is what I am really after. As a pastor, I only want to build relationships with people to help them along as they grow spiritually.
Let’s say you visit my church and I introduce myself as “Hi, I’m Marshall.” We have a great conversation about the church or whatever, and later you find out that I’m a pastor. I have just showed you that having a relationship is more important than some authority structure. I have shattered your way of thinking about guys who use a title to control groups of people and communicated the importance of a relationship. Which is part of a bigger picture. Most people strive for a title because they think that a title carries authority…and sometimes it does. However if you choose to lead from your heart, which is God given, as opposed to a title, which is man given, you will always see greater results. The title “pastor” on my business card doesn’t make me a pastor…the fact that I want relationships with people so that I can influence them to grow in God is what makes me a pastor.
So if you are in a position of authority, try introducing yourself as a person instead of a title and watch how much farther the relationship goes.
